There was a showdown in the Lost and Tired corral this afternoon. Gavin has been having issues throughout the day, most of which we have let slide. We did so to try and keep the peace.
Lizze nor I have the energy to deal with meltdown, if it can be avoided.
However, as we were sitting down to dinner, Lizze had asked Gavin a question. It was an it was a simple question and instead of answering her, he screamed at her.
That was it, I had run out of patience.
When we spoke with Dr. Pattie on Tuesday, we had decided that we must cracked down on his treatment of Lizze. His disrespectful attitude towards her will not be tolerated. It would be the same for any of the other boys.
Something else that Dr. Pattie mentioned was that Gavin had many qualities of a child with attachment disorder. That will be a whole other posts if anything ever comes of that.
The moment he screamed at Lizze, I pulled him aside and told him that he would be having oatmeal for dinner. I explained that we had been very patient with his behavior today but he will not disrespect his mother.
Of course, that led to a massive meltdown. Self-injury, stomping, screaming and flinging himself around, we’re all on tap.
It took Lizze and both a little while to get him to go upstairs.
At one point, as I was walking with him up the stairs, he turned to me and screamed as loud as he could, right in my face. I carefully, and I mean carefully, pinched his cheeks to stop the screaming. At this point I had to tap out and let Lizze step in because I didn’t want to lose my cool. Lizze and I always back each other up in these situations so that of one of us gets pulled in to deep we can tap out before we lose our temper. It’s worked out quite well over the years.
Eventually Gavin went to his room and we let him chill there for about 30 minutes.
The boys were visibly and understandably upset so we fed Gavin dinner, after the boys had already had a peaceful dinner.
After Gavin finished his dinner, I told him that he would not be playing with his brothers tonight and that he would need to go read his book until it was time for bed. When he was that out of control, we tend to keep him as isolated from the boys as we can, at least for a while. We just want to play things on the safe side.
Lizze and I are going to talk tonight and try and figure out a plan of attack. Something has to change and change significantly. These meltdowns are getting more and more violent. He’s also engaging in more violent play and seems to enjoy scaring his brothers.
I forgot to mention that when we picked him up from the hospital on Monday and we’re on our way home after picking up the other boys, Gavin told Elliott that the hospital tortured him.
Lizze shut him down but Gavin kept scaring Elliott. Elliott is already terrified of the hospital and doctors in general. Gavin knows this.
I fear that we have some tough decisions ahead of us.
Our love for Gavin is never in question, however, our ability to cope with his behavior much longer, is.
**Thanks for reading**
-Lost and Tired
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