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Tag Archive: child

Jun 30 2012

Providing comfort to a child in pain


Emmett is once again on the verge of a new fever flare.  The sores are already forming on his tongue and he is already miserable.  I hate these fever flares because Emmett is in so much pain and there is not much we can do to comfort him.

If we’re lucky,  we can provide him with a little bit of comfort when we can.

This afternoon was one of those times where I was able to help him to find some peace.  I snuggled under the big comfy comforter on the couch with him for a little bit.  We didn’t sleep for long but he dozed off for a few minutes and that’s better than nothing.

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**Thanks for reading**

       -Lost and Tired

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This was posted via WordPress for Android, courtesy of Samsung’s Galaxy S III. Please forgive any typos. I do know how to spell but auto-correct is working against me.

Permanent link to this article: http://lostandtired.com/2012/06/30/providing-comfort-to-a-child-in-pain/

Jun 29 2012

How do you cope with bad news?


The Lost and Tired family is no stranger to bad news.  Having said that,  we are far from the only family to have to cope with hearing bad news.  In our case,  the bad news usually centers around Gavin and his health issues.

We had a big screen this week that turned out,  thankfully,  to not be as bad as I had feared.

However,  the impact of thinking the worst,  is not something that just disappeared when I spoke with the doctor this afternoon.  For that last 36 hours,  both my wife and I have been riding an adrenaline rush,  even after we learned the good news.

It got me thinking.  I wonder how other people cope with getting disheartening news about their child‘s health?

Personally,  I don’t drink,  smoke or do drugs.  However,  when I get really stressed out,  as I was this week,  my diet goes out the window. I just don’t care anymore and I lose all will power and want to eat myself into oblivion.

It’s not a healthy way of dealing with life but it’s what I tend to do. 

Sometimes,  I’ll put more time and energy into working out instead. However,  that decision doesn’t happen nearly as often as it should.

The same thing or similar happened with the diagnosis of #Autism with each of my boys.  I’m not proud of handling things like that but I suppose that it could be worse. Right? Right….

How do you folks handle things like hearing bad news about your child‘s health? How do you handle stress in general?

**Thanks for reading**

       -Lost and Tired

Please join our Autism Help Forum

Look for “Autism Help” app at the Google Play Store

MyFreeCopyright.com Registered & Protected

This was posted via WordPress for Android, courtesy of Samsung’s Galaxy S III. Please forgive any typos. I do know how to spell but auto-correct is working against me.

Permanent link to this article: http://lostandtired.com/2012/06/29/how-do-you-cope-with-bad-news/

Jun 20 2012

Making lunch for the inconsolable child


Emmett is absolutely inconsolable today.  I made,  remade,  re-remade,  re-re-made and re-re-re-remade his lunch because there was something wrong with each of my attempts. I’m trying really hard to be patient but holy crap,  he’s not making it easy.

I’m able to maintain my cool because this isn’t his fault,  he’s absolutely miserable right now.

After I finally got lunch today meet his approval,  his chair became the new problem. After the chair was fixed he ended up with the goddamn hiccups. Poor kid can’t catch a break. For that matter,  neither can I.

If you follow me on Foursquare,  you’ll see that I checked myself into the Lost and Tired Looney Bin….. :-(


**Thanks for reading**

       -Lost and Tired

Please join our Autism Help Forum

Look for “Autism Help” app at the Google Play Store

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Posted from WordPress for Android so please forgive the auto-correct induced typos

Permanent link to this article: http://lostandtired.com/2012/06/20/making-lunch-for-the-inconsolable-child/

Jun 16 2012

How do you explain tattling to a child on the #Autism spectrum?


Everyone since this whole thing with Gavin and boundary issues started a few months ago,  Elliott has become an extreme tattletale

We had a talk with Elliott many months ago about not keeping secrets from us.  Gavin had once again begun having issues with respecting personal space and inappropriate touching. Elliott was a target for those issues.

When we found out,  we met with Dr.  Pattie and had a long talk with Elliott about not keeping secrets and no one being allowed to touch him etc.

Since then,  Elliott has become very good at not keeping secrets. In fact,  he has taken to almost constantly reporting everything that happens. 

He has become a tattletale.

What started out as simply wanting him to tell us if Gavin did something that made him uncomfortable has turned into a constant stream of tattling. It’s actually become a problem and it’s one of our own creation.

Do you folks have to deal with any tattletales in your house?  How do you explain the difference between good tattling and bad tattling to a child on the #Autism spectrum?


**Thanks for reading**

       -Lost and Tired

Please join our Autism Help Forum

Look for “Autism Help” app at the Google Play Store

MyFreeCopyright.com Registered & Protected

Posted from WordPress for Android so please forgive the auto-correct induced typos

Permanent link to this article: http://lostandtired.com/2012/06/16/how-do-you-explain-tattling-to-a-child-on-the-autism-spectrum/

Jun 13 2012

Trouble with discipline


Everyone knows that having to discipline your child is often very unpleasant. We do it because we want our kids to learn from their mistakes and move forward.

What happens though,  if your child never seems to learn from their mistakes?

This appears to be the case my son Gavin. He honestly never learns from his mistakes. He does the same things,  over and over again. It’s extremely frustrating for all involved and made discipline next to impossible. It doesn’t matter how we hold him accountable or how many times we explain things,  he makes the same choices almost every time.

To me,  discipline is only effective if it works.  In Gavin’s case,  nothing works and we are constantly having to shift gears and think outside the box.

Every specialist we have turned to has the same answer or rather lack there of.  Basically,  no one knows what to tell us. With everything have done or tried over the last 5 or 6 years,  something should have worked. I would go so far as to say that correcting Gavin’s behavioral issues is pointless and a waste of my resource that limited to begin with.

Having said that,  how does someone give up on their child? I don’t know how to do that.

Gavin’s biological father is a sociopath.  He has no regard for anyone but himself.  There has been a long standing concern that Gavin was heading in that same direction. To the average person,  hearing something like this is just unbelievable. 

Sure,  Gavin gets upset when he does something wrong.  However,  the problem is that he’s never upset that he did something wrong,  he’s upset because he was caught and being held accountable. There’s a big difference between the two.

I still get email or comments from people who just can’t accept the fact that Gavin has control over these meltdowns.  They are making a huge mistake because they are comparing Gavin to their own child and that’s not a good practice to start with. Gavin is very unique and has a multitude of things that make him very complex.  These behaviors are driven by much more than just sensory issues.

Trust me when I say this,  Gavin has control over these meltdowns.  We have been doing this a very long time and have sought out every possible doctor or specialist imaginable. Nothing ever works or works for very long.  That’s a large part of why things are so difficult.  As difficult as things are,  it’s even more difficult to give up or even feel like I’m giving up on him.

Not giving up has come at a very high price.  I don’t think we can afford that expense much longer.  Things are going to have to change and quickly.  I have to preserve my family and protect the health of the healthy.

Permanent link to this article: http://lostandtired.com/2012/06/13/trouble-with-discipline/

Jun 09 2012

Saturday Soapbox: Smoking


I climbed on my soapbox last week to vent about parents that don’t put their kids in carseats. You folks responded really well to that and a good dialog was started.

I was thinking that I could do this more often.

So I have decided to have Saturday Soapbox. Basically,  I’ll voice my opinion about something that bothers me and the you all discuss your thoughts and and feelings on the issue.

For today’s Saturday Soapbox,  I’m going to talk about smoking with your kids in the car.

This has been a pet peeve of mine for as long as I can remember. I’ve never understood why someone would knowingly put their child at risk for things like,  asthma,  cancer or countless other illnesses.

Personally,  I don’t understand smoking in general. I know that it’s an addiction and a powerful one at that but it says Causes Cancer,  right on the package. A person is well within their rights to smoke and likely loose many years off their lives but forcing your kids to breath that same,  unfiltered,  toxic air is simply not right. You have made the  choice to smoke,  your kids haven’t.

It drives me crazy to see someone driving around,  with their windows up and chain smoking.  Especially when their children are in the back seat.

I’ve seen little kids coughing and Mom or Dad keep puffing away,  completely oblivious to what they are putting their kids through. At the very least,  roll the friggin Window down.  For the love of God,  think about your innocent kids,  choking in the back seat.  It’s bad enough that they aren’t in a carseat but now they can’t breathe either.

I don’t understand why this isn’t considered child endangerment.

We know it’s dangerous for both the person behind the filter and for the person in front of the filter.  It’s not like these are just my opinions,  these are undisputed,  scientific facts.

Even Big Tobacco knows that their product kills. It really doesn’t take a rocket scientist to realize that you are directly affecting your child’s health and potentially even their future.

 

Please,  please,  please,  if you must smoke do so away from your kids. Please don’t smoke in the house or car,  especially if it’s in the presence of your children. You have the right to do this to yourself and I respect that,  just please don’t make that same decision for your children.

Most of my siblings smoke.  It doesn’t make them bad people. Like you,  they are good people who are making not so good choices.

Please,  if you’re not going to care enough about yourself to either quit smoking on your own or get to help to do so,  at least think about what your unfiltered,  secondhand smoke is doing to your precious children.

Permanent link to this article: http://lostandtired.com/2012/06/09/saturday-soapbox-smoking/

May 31 2012

I have to climb on my soapbox


I don’t make it a habit of judging people because I know what it’s like to be on the receiving end of that.  However,  I simply can’t take it anymore.

This is a general rant and is not directed at any one person in particular.

Forgive me if I offend you.

I am saying this not only as a parent but as a former firefighter and paramedic.  Please,  put your kids in a friggin carseat. There is absolutely no excuse not to. 

When you leave the hospital after your child is born they ask you if you need a carseat.  You could have said yes and it would have been free.  I don’t want to hear you can’t afford one. There are organizations in your community that will provide you with free carseats.

I can’t tell you what it feels like to see you driving down the freeway with your 3 year old child climbing all over the inside of the car.  I don’t understand what makes you think that it’s okay to allow that.  Do you not fear the loss or injury of your child.

I have been the one to pull a child out of a car wreck that wasn’t secured in a carseat or seat belt.  I have seen the injuries and I know what can happen to those who never think it will happen to them.

Please for the love of God and your children, put your child in a goddamn carseat. If you can’t afford one,  look into your local community services,  you can very likely acquire one at no cost.

Please do not take chances with your child’s life.  You will never be able to undo that mistake and you will never forgive yourself. 

Alright,  I have spoken my peace and I will not make a habit of doing this.

Permanent link to this article: http://lostandtired.com/2012/05/31/i-have-to-climb-on-my-soapbox/

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